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Student of the FORCE, I Am

Recently a friend of mine told me that she doesn't know anything about STAR WARS. She called Darth Vader... wait for it... Darth [or Dark] Invader?! WTF! She expressed some interest in it and wanted me to explain it to her [aha a potential apprentice hahaha]. She was probably too drunk, just joking and wasn't half serious. But it got me thinking... I'm a Star Wars fan, I buy toys, merchandise, read books/comics, watch the movies over and over etc. But I wasn't living the philosophy of the Force [the lighside of course].

In Episode I: The Phantom Menace, Master Yoda speaks these words to Anakin Skywalker:
“Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering."

I HAD much HATE in my heart. For 5 years now I have been carrying a burden, a burden which I could not share with anyone else, and I HATED my dad for it. I often answer back to him just to provoke him. I ridicule and contradict his ideas [good or bad I didn't give a shit]. We even came close to blows a few years back. This has put a strain on our almost non-existent relationship. We barely talk nowadays. We were suffering the both of us. Master Yoda was right.

Yesterday after a long talk with my Guama [Grand mother, Mother's side] I decided to finally forgive him [I told him I forgave him 5 years ago but I never did]. It may seem weird that I am writing about something so personal on the web, but to me it is a way to make it real. A way to give me strength, to do what I have to do. To finally do away with my hate and to try and lead a better life. I am unsure what will happen when I go talk to him after I post this, but I am certain that I feel a lot better and that the Force is with me on this one.

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