2:40 pm My Future
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In a fit of extreme boredom that is currently engulfing my very being at this moment. I'd like to tell you about My Future. Now, my grandma & mom just came from a soothsayer (or oracle, whichever term is to your liking). Here's what lies ahead for me.
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1) I should get married NOW! And if I marry now or upto my 32nd birthday. My wife would really help me. Ok I'm not sure if my mom or grandma used a headlock or a figure four leg lock or both on the soothsayer for him/her to say this.
2) Provided I do #1. I will have a better life from 32 onwards and will be earning a lot. Also I will be earning money for 30 years only. Therefore the money coming in after my 62nd birthday (if I get married at 32) will either be my wife's or my kids'. Interesting really... How do day figure out these things?
3) Another thing is I should not under any circumstances marry a woman who was born in the year of the Ox (Chinese Zodiac). If I do this we will always butt-heads and fight. I was born in the year of the Goat, so in Chinese Zodiac I don't play well with the Ox... well that's how I understand it.
4) The soothsayer says I'm a very moody person and that I should stop eating beef so I would become less moody. My mom always complains about how moody I am and she says she did not mention this to the soothsayer. How can she know how I am? I haven't even met her? Again Ox=Beef=Bad?! Um I don't think I'll be giving up Steak Dinners anytime soon.
5) She says my fate is as a 'boss' not as an 'employee'. Is this some sort of subdued positive reinforcement for me to work harder for our family business?
6) Some more in connection to #5. I'm a diligent worker with initiative. Hmmm some more of that positive reinforcement?
7) I will marry ahead of my older bro. I don't know why/how this is significant?
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To recap: I should marry now (except Year of the Ox), and stop eating beef to have a happy/prosperous life.
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Here's were we stand so far:
#1 I've no girlfriend. I'm not dating or courting or even flirting with anyone.
#2 I still eat beef.
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Shit! I'm 0 for 2.
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My grandma is offering to introduce me (for the nth time)... um thanks but no thanks. I'd like to go and look for my own non-Ox significant other.
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What is it with Chinese culture and marriage? Almost everyone older than me is telling me to get hitched (or asking about it). Each time I see an uncle or aunt the initial reaction is: 'Are you seeing anyone? When are you getting married?' Whatever happened to: 'Hi how are you? You seem taller/shorter, thinner/fatter, darker/fairer etc.'? Maybe when you hit the mid-20s they switch to different questionaires.
--
In a fit of extreme boredom that is currently engulfing my very being at this moment. I'd like to tell you about My Future. Now, my grandma & mom just came from a soothsayer (or oracle, whichever term is to your liking). Here's what lies ahead for me.
--
1) I should get married NOW! And if I marry now or upto my 32nd birthday. My wife would really help me. Ok I'm not sure if my mom or grandma used a headlock or a figure four leg lock or both on the soothsayer for him/her to say this.
2) Provided I do #1. I will have a better life from 32 onwards and will be earning a lot. Also I will be earning money for 30 years only. Therefore the money coming in after my 62nd birthday (if I get married at 32) will either be my wife's or my kids'. Interesting really... How do day figure out these things?
3) Another thing is I should not under any circumstances marry a woman who was born in the year of the Ox (Chinese Zodiac). If I do this we will always butt-heads and fight. I was born in the year of the Goat, so in Chinese Zodiac I don't play well with the Ox... well that's how I understand it.
4) The soothsayer says I'm a very moody person and that I should stop eating beef so I would become less moody. My mom always complains about how moody I am and she says she did not mention this to the soothsayer. How can she know how I am? I haven't even met her? Again Ox=Beef=Bad?! Um I don't think I'll be giving up Steak Dinners anytime soon.
5) She says my fate is as a 'boss' not as an 'employee'. Is this some sort of subdued positive reinforcement for me to work harder for our family business?
6) Some more in connection to #5. I'm a diligent worker with initiative. Hmmm some more of that positive reinforcement?
7) I will marry ahead of my older bro. I don't know why/how this is significant?
--
To recap: I should marry now (except Year of the Ox), and stop eating beef to have a happy/prosperous life.
--
Here's were we stand so far:
#1 I've no girlfriend. I'm not dating or courting or even flirting with anyone.
#2 I still eat beef.
--
Shit! I'm 0 for 2.
--
My grandma is offering to introduce me (for the nth time)... um thanks but no thanks. I'd like to go and look for my own non-Ox significant other.
--
What is it with Chinese culture and marriage? Almost everyone older than me is telling me to get hitched (or asking about it). Each time I see an uncle or aunt the initial reaction is: 'Are you seeing anyone? When are you getting married?' Whatever happened to: 'Hi how are you? You seem taller/shorter, thinner/fatter, darker/fairer etc.'? Maybe when you hit the mid-20s they switch to different questionaires.
hehehe. nice read bro. you made me laugh. hehehe. instead of your grandma, ako nalang hahanap para sayo. hehehe
ReplyDeleteAng galeng! You're the first who I know na nagpaganyan sa "soothsayer". Naaliw ako, hehe ^_^ so... added pressure ba? ^_^
ReplyDelete@byron salamat men hahaha :o)
ReplyDelete@mahal oo medyo added pressure ng konti chaka nakakatawa din!